I am not an anniversary person. I never celebrated dating anniversaries (well one year two girl friends and I all had concurrent anniversaries with our boyfriends but we spent that day together just the three of us smoking cigars and listening to Delila in a backyard hot tub (best anniversary ever)).
But mine and Mr.'s first wedding anniversary is coming up, and I have been thinking about that lately. More so just amazed that a year has passed already and reflecting over the past year of being married to the best man. (well he was the groom, but you get it)
I can't believe that I love Mr. now more than the day we were married. (I am not trying to be sweet or especially sentimental) Just saying I understand what people mean. We have been together longer. TOGETHER in the sense of waking up in the middle of the night with Mr. wailing uncontrollably and thinking I was going to have to take him to the emergency room, or TOGETHER in the sense of bursting out laughing to keep from crying while my Mr. is hysterically yelling because the Jo Jo has ... wait for it... vomited on the bed (that had newly changed sheets, as if it could be any worse). TOGETHER in the sense of "honey I'm going to sleep on the couch because your sick"... "no really you're keeping me up and I don't want to catch what you have!" TOGETHER meaning being mind bogglingly bored trapped in the house while the walls are almost shaking because the music at Cowboys stadium is so loud and the traffic is too horrendous to leave the neighborhood.
The other day I realized, I married a man I had never been bowling with. (We went and neither of us bowls very well).
Life is amazing and ridiculous. **Sometimes I want to take our marriage back. It's true sometimes I am weak, scared, frustrated. But the wonderful thing is, it is done. I can't take it back. I mean don't think I can ... I don't think you can get in annulled after this long ... But I digress.
But marriage doesn't end just because I want to quit that is the beautiful thing about marriage. I didn't go into this marriage thing thinking everything was going to be fairy tales and roses even though that is what it was May 10, 2010. But the things brought us closer and made me (hopefully Mr. too) love each other more is the hard things. The times that were frustrating, and hard, and scary made me trust and rely more on us TOGETHER rather than just me.
I'm not perfect. Obviously see asterisks. But Mr. is much better than I am: more patient, understanding, loving and forgiving. He is my yang. He doesn't complete me (neither of us can bowl!) But he does a hell of a job complimenting me. We make it work.
We are less than a month away from 1 year. Hopefully there will be many, many more years.